Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Today is the first day of preschool for Little Lawns, who was SO ready to go. Now, I have ready many a Mommy Blog post about moms dropping their kids off for the first time and how they are all teary eyed and sad that their babies are growing up and all that, which is fine, but let me tell you, I did not experience these emotions at all. Not one bit, man. I was ecstatic. Right now, I am in Starbucks, ALONE, and I am writing and later I might even go to Target alone just because I can, even though I don't need anything.

Lately I started getting the sense that Little Lawns, who is a very energetic, enthusiastic and strong-willed, little pixie, needed a challenge. She is nothing like me. She's very social and likes to be out and about all the time and if she isn't thoroughly worn out every day, she gets into a lot of mischief because she is bored. We just really felt that she was ready and would thrive in school, and I'm pretty confident about that, which is why I wasn't sad about her going (plus I get writing time!). I'm so excited for her and I'm excited that I can meet all kinds of cool, new moms to be friends with. I'm already friends with one of the moms in her class anyway. And now, there are all kinds of volunteering opportunities for me. I love getting involved with stuff. Like for real. I even got excited about packing her lunch. This morning I signed up for the bake sale. I am going to throw down some brownies and pie, y'all. I also signed up to cook for the Ladies Teas, which the school holds for elderly women in the community several times a year. I thought that sounded right up my alley. Cooking and having tea with old ladies? Hell yeah. I am there. I'm so thrilled about being part of the school community and all the possibilities opening up that I couldn't possibly be sad. I love that Little Lawns is growing up. She's way more fun as an actual, talking, opinionated, little girl than as a baby.

So now I also have a lot more free time! I decided to dedicate my extra four hours per day to my writing, and I am making strong headway on the sequel to Amateur Night at the Bubblegum Kittikat, called Sun Shower. You're going to love it. It's turning into a lighter, sweeter book than Amateur Night. It's far less dark.

So speaking of books, oh mah lord. I've been reading Marisha Pessl's new book Night Film, and I'm only halfway through, so I'm not going to review it just yet. So don't buy it yet, because I haven't formed a complete opinion. I need to see how it ends first and then I'll let you know if it's worth your time. The book is like 600 pages, so it's a big investment.

In other news, after eating like a fucking asshole all summer, and thoroughly enjoying it, I ended up making myself sick and gaining a ton of weight. Not fun at all. Since I've been home I've been on a pretty strict, but not at all psycho, detox diet. My stomach thanks me. I also lost four pounds so far, but honestly, I have eleven more to go to reach my goal.

I'm turning 40 in a couple months and totally freaking the fuck out about it. I think I'm having a midlife crisis or something. I swear. And what I want for my fortieth birthday is to be at my fittest and healthiest that I've ever been. I want to be proud of how I look, which isn't to say that I'm ashamed, because I don't look THAT bad, but I want to be in much better shape. Yoga hasn't helped as much as I'd hoped with that, although it has helped tremendously with other things. So, as a big treat to myself, in the spirit of really honoring my body, which I've never really done, I hired a trainer/ nutritionist and she designed a diet for me, and wow, it has a lot of fucking kale. You may recall that I am not a fan, but I'm really trying here. I was impressed by how balanced and sensible the menu plan was. No food groups are missing. I still get fruit, a ton of veggies, a disturbing amount of fiber, fish, chicken, all sorts of good things. It makes sense, because look, crazy diets don't work and they aren't healthy and I can't follow them anyway. So far, I feel great. My stomach is perfect and I've struggled with stomach trouble since childhood. Must be the fiber.

Oh man, the fiber. I feel like I'm eating sawdust, gravel and particle board instead of cereal and bread. I attempted to eat a bowl of kale the other day and I'm telling you, I was pretty sure that a few hours later I was going to chew my cud from it. Today, I'm supposed to attempt a raw kale salad, which involves, you guessed it, massaging the freaking kale. Why is it that every time I make fun of something on here that I end up doing the exact thing I laughed at? Ugh. I don't know how I'm going to like this, but the nutritionist told me to add blueberries to it because blueberries are my favorite food (yes, really, since I was a baby) and that might make me more amenable to it. I'll let you know.

How are you all doing?


JoeinVegas said...

Blueberries and kale? oh.

Doing well today, thanks for asking. Still working on the kitchen remodel. Putting a few pieces of flooring in each night after work (I'm too detailed with the cuts and fit to move fast) and hopefully will finish up this long Labor Day weekend.

Anonymous said...

I've heard that a salad made of kale massaged with avocado is divine. Apparently, the oils in the avocado help break down the chewiness of the kale. Aand, avocados are no slouches in the fiber department, so it's win-win. Who knew?

Anonymous said...

Just finished your book and I LOVED it! I knew I would because I've been reading your blog for years. Thank you for keeping me entertained. I'm really looking forward to the sequel.

I am trying to drop some pounds, too. In an effort to be more healthy, I bought a juicer at a garage sale and I am really loving it. I never order green juices or carrot juice when I'm out and about but there is something appealing about making it myself. I don't even have to peel the fruit and veggies. Just throw them in whole and voila... Juice.

Mrs. Gumby said...

Massaging kale? Say what?? Who knew that green leafy veggies needed a masseuse?

Anonymous said...

My friend swears by her kale chips, made in the oven.

Green said...

Hi Widey. I just wanted to let you know that I have two friends (because it certainly isn't me) who've whipped their bodies into impressive shape. One did it through kettleballs and kale, and the other is doing it through the bar method and kale. So you're definitely on the right track with the kale. Better you than me - I could never choke that slimy shit down.

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