Wednesday, June 17, 2009

On Sale Now - Used Catheter Bags by Anthropologie


Dear Anthropologie, I was thrilled beyond all imagination when you opened a store near me. Until just recently, I had to drive a great distance north or south to visit one of your stores, or I had to just wait until I went on vacation to California or big cities. Still, Anthropologie was the store of my dreams; a mix of campy, shabby, luxurious, exotic and things that are extremely expensive but look like once in a lifetime thrift store finds. Your style is the equivalent of a woman who spends hours on her hair and makeup to make herself look as if she isn't wearing a single speck of makeup and has just gotten out of bed with perfectly tousled curls. When I shop in your stores (and I admit that I have only purchased a total of about five things in my entire life and all of them were on clearance) I feel just like Amelie, which is really the ultimate goal of every wanna-be hip, poetic woman who also loves Belle and Sebastian and shops at farmer's markets with wicker baskets. We all want to be Amelie. Ordinarily Anthropologie, I admire your window displays. All of them look like they've been crafted by art students (girls with short bangs and cats eye glasses) who also have their own Etsy stores and I love that, so imagine my absolute horror when I went to visit the new store yesterday and saw the display in the above photograph. I stopped dead in my tracks. Who decided that a window display of used catheter bags, depicting various levels of hydration as evidenced by the range of amber hues, would be a nice way to celebrate the gauzy sundresses and retro-print melamine plates of summer? I really think you need to reconsider this choice, as everyone who walks by is instantly reminded of their grandfathers' prostate surgeries - the ammonia, bleach and iodine smell of the hospitals, the patients yelling in other rooms, and Oh God, the time the full bag somehow disconnected from the plastic tubing and, well...it was awful. Please Anthropologie, I'm begging you to change this window display to something breezier, maybe with papier mache robin redbreasts, because looking at something that looks like it was recently removed from someone's urethra does not make me want to buy the Post Secret book, a Tibetan Temple scented candle or a white dress called "Acres of Indigo."

17 comments:

FreshHell said...

Ew. That is nasty. they look like they'd smell really bad, too, like passing a wino on the street or cleaning a cat litter box you've left too long.

Eric said...

My wife loves it too. She says she can walk into an Anthropology and close her eyes, spin around with an arm extended stop and she will be pointing at something she wants.
Your art school comment immediatly made me think of Lucy Knisey Recent MFA from the Art Institute of Chicago and really cool cartoonist. find her here Lucy Knisey I think you may enjoy her work. Also my secret word is berpsi. It is what happens i fyou guzzle Pepsi

Melanie said...

Ugh! I'm glad I didn't see the window display up close; I could barely stand to glance at your photograph. Yuck!

MtnMama said...

Once again, WL, I bow to your writing genius!

-- and that's exactly what they look like!

mcgrimus said...

Some sick part of me thinks it would be fun to walk through such a display---the bags of fluid gently nudging and caressing me, bouncing playfully across my nervous yet eager body until mall security pulls me away and zip-ties my wrists....

Student/Teacher said...

Gross.

Erica said...

I think this might have been kind of cool IF.....IF....it had been done in another color, say blues, or greens, or purples...but yellow? How are we supposed to think of anything BUT urine?? ugh..

Lush said...

This made me laugh. Awesome.

Missicat said...

Yuck. Maybe it was presented as a JOKE and someone took it seriously?

Eric said...

Were the ones on the right hanging over the Asperagus forks?

JoeinVegas said...

Hmm, sounds like you went in and looked around anyway.

Aleta said...

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.... that's just awful!

Anonymous said...

Oh my god, I'm reading this at work and laughing so loud I might get fired. How do you DO this? Of course that is exactly what they look like "in vairous stages of hydration" O, I've got to stop and look busy, what did I do before I had you to read.

Robin in Ohio said...

You know...having had to change/clean catheter bags as a nurse aide (working my way through college), I found this display disgusting! It brought back old long-buried memories that should have stayed buried. Ugh! What were the Anthropologie decorators thinking??? Double ugh!

Miss Kitty said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! WL, your letter is beyond hilarious!

I agree with Eric--any random pointing game will lead me to something in an Anthropologie store that I want. Fortunately, my craft Mom can reproduce most of their clothing, with much better quality. And I'm paying my mom to make it, instead of some little kid overseas.

The Anthropologie that Pixie and I went to in Boulder, CO had pint-size Mason jars suspended from the ceiling by thin steel wires poked through the jar lids. Wonder WTF the window dressers at your store were thinking?

gigiofca said...

Weird! I guess they are recycling. That is the marketing spin. ;-)

Chelsea Bryan Knights said...

Hmm... this display was a miss, but they have so many hits! I love Anthropologie! Especially their visual displays; they're so creative. I often look to Anthro for inspiration when I create my own window displays, which I've been posting on my fashion/art blog.

-Chelsea Knights
http://chelseabryanknights.blogspot.com

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