Friday, November 16, 2007

And I Forgot to Add...

...that last night I busted myself in the face with the shower door and now I have a black eye, while earlier in the day I was trying to get something out from under a desk and ended up hitting my head on the desk corner hard enough to make it bleed. I'm not in good shape Dear Readers. People are going to think my husband beats me, but I can assure you that the sweet, gentle man only WANTS to beat me. He doesn't actually do it.

10 comments:

Joy said...

I too am grace-challenged. So sorry about your black eye and banged up head. I'm looking forward to the rest of your story. I wish I could come to your house for Thanksgiving!

EvylFashioinista said...

Now you and Aunt Kyle will both have black eyes for the holidays!! Perhaps you'll start a new family tradition. :-D

Tere said...

Oh, but think of the fun you could have with those bruises in public!

You could be at the grocery store, and when husband reaches over to grab a pack of cookies, you start shrieking and shaking and backing away....

Pumpkin said...

My husband is as graceful as Bambi on Ice....when Bambi's had too much to drink....only has 3 legs.....and can'T see out of one eye.....he permanently has bruises of every kind, he feels your pain.
Can't wait for the second half of the story lass!!!!!!!
xxxx

grouchosuave said...

So what time should I show up?

I can bring lawn darts and my grandma's 'Mock Enchilada Casserole' made with saltines, chef boyardee and bacon-cheddar cheezewiz.

Gotta go.
I'm in Oakland so I have to start walking now if I want to get to your place by kickoff.



http://grouchosuave.wordpress.com/

grouchosuave said...

whoops
gsuave here.
ignore the previous comment. Posted to the wrong entry of yours.

Anonymous said...

Must be something cosmic. I was a huge klutz today, too. Hit my head on the shower door, got clonked in the head at work, and generally unusually clumsy. Today a coworker and a dancer ran into each other accidentally at full speeed; she hit him in the chest with her elbow.

It hurt because an hour later he was still complaining.

misha said...

i can relate - i opened up my car door on my face - the corner left a puncture wound a half inch from my eye - lucky! all my other facial injuries have come from the current love of my life - my wonderful siberian husky! Only male to give me a black eye and once i stop repeating oh fuck i will still love and hug him :)

misha said...

OMG - tere's comment! My ex husband broke both his elbows mountain biking in MIAMI... We were shopping once and a sales lady asked what happened - he said i threw him off the roof. I instantly brought out my best evil soap opera look (its damn good) and growled "what did i tell you about telling other people that". as he was apologizing the girl just started discretely backing up. It was the best. I also bruise so easily that every time i go to the doctor i pretty much have to let them know, that no, I am not being abused...at least physically but thats a whole other story.

Green said...

My friend was just reminding us tonight of the time she broke her own nose (against a wall) and had to wait for seven hours in the ER and the cops kept trying to ask if her husband had beaten her and she couldn't convince them he'd been asleep.

Sorry you beat yourself up so much. Please be nice to yourself, otherwise I'm going to send you a helmet with your name on it for Hanukah.

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